Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Tuesday Gratitude

Today started out like a mixed bag of salad. Some bits you pick out and want to gobble up, other bits even the dog won’t eat. I don't anticipate it changing until sometime Thursday afternoon. Considering in the past I would be in full blown melt down by now, I'd say we are ahead of the game. Also take into consideration where I was and what I was doing 1 year ago today and I'd say I'm doing freaking amazing.

1 year ago today was a Monday. It was the day I got laid off and the day my Mom had her stroke. I remember going into work early because end of month was looming and I had not finished posting the stack of invoices on my desk. I had no sooner finished putting down my purse when Tripp walked into my office and said "Beth, I'm sorry but I have to let you go. My dad sold the company on Friday" at that I laughed and continued to take off my jacket and prepare for my days work. See, I used to regularly ask Tripp to fire me when I felt overwhelmed, and I felt overwhelmed a lot. On this occasion however, Tripp did not come back with "you're not that lucky" Instead he stood there looking at his shoes shuddering something about "this being out of my hands. I couldn't tell you. Dad needed to sell" and a bunch of other trite BS that I had failed to hear. You see, when I realized he was not kidding, all the blood in my body rushed to my head and all I could hear was the sound of my career coming to an end. It still amazes me how fast I packed up and headed home. In less than an hour I had the contents of my entire office, 3 years of work and 1 beta fish in my car headed home. My very first call was to my mom. I knew she was off that day due to company visiting. That's when my Auntie answered and informed me my mother had had a stroke and was currently in the ER being seen. Um, yeah, not a good day.

Today, in stark contrast, my mother is healthy and relatively happy and sane considering my father was laid off back in September. I am working at a job that appreciates me, stimulates me, and allows my inner superhero to come out and play. Given all of this, it makes the hamster poop on my bedroom carpet, a hamster biting my toes while I'm trying to ride the stationary beast, the 7th and final day of my detox and it being flat, grey and chilly out all not seem so bad. It even makes the fact that after working all day, I have to go home and clean the house, look rather rosy. I've said it before, perspective is everything.

Today I'm grateful for:

a year of growth, change, love, salvation and blessings. 1 year ago today started a chain of events that lead me back to church, lead me away from WoW, lead me to my inner superhero, and back to writing and photography. Today my life is 100X better than where it was 1 year ago. Considering I thought my life was pretty peachy at that time, tells you just how blessed my life is now.

my improved relationship with my mother: That day woke me up and made me face a possibility of a life without my mother. It put a magnifying glass to our relationship and lit a fire in me to work to improve it. It created in me the desire to tell my mother daily just how blessed I am to have her in her life. It spurred me to say what I needed to say.

the kittens. They held my hand, they held me up, they dried my tears and moved me forward. 1 year later and the DK is in my past but I'm blessed to say the kittens are not. I love you guys. Seriously.

Heth Realty, Inc. Seriously, I love my job. In the 11 moths I've been working here I have been rewarded beyond measure. I have been appreciated, bribed, promoted to IT director, Payroll coordinator and Maintenance Superhero. I'm told daily how trusted, valued and respected I am. I am backed, sided with, validated and praised. The pay may suck but the rewards are priceless.

Smoke Free and Healing for One Year, Two Months, Twenty Two Days, 22 Hours and 41 Minutes, while extending my life expectancy 93 Days and 12 Hours, by avoiding the use of 26937 nicotine delivery devices that would have cost me $4,801.98.

200 days, 12 hours, 43 minutes till we return to paradise. June 13, 2010 we carve out 1 week from our busy lives to play newlyweds. It refreshes and repairs what daily living takes away. 1 week a year I find paradise waiting wherever my man is stands saying "I drin binkin Baby."

finding the humor. Even if it's after the fact. This morning, while I was on the stationary beast, the hamper was in the mood to play. Each time I peddled, he tried to bite my toes. Each time getting the timing not quite right and getting TWACKED in the chops and squeaking like a squeaky toy, shaking it off and going back again. Just so you know, I'm NOT a morning person and I HATE the stationary beast. I did not find the hamsters actions at all amusing. I tried saying "No" and "NO" and "NO!!!!!" and "Stop it you dirty bugger!" and "I'm gonna put you outside if you do that one more freaking time!" I must give the hamster his props. He has persistence. In the middle of my work-out I had to dismount. When I did this, something in my demeanor must have told him he was in trouble because he scampered away. The more I chased him, the more I got pissed off, the faster he scampered away. FINALLY I snatched him up and tossed his butt into the Florida room (his rather large kennel) and went back to working out. Now, a good 5+ hours later, I can laugh.

My man. He puts up with my morning persona with quiet reserve. He kisses me goodbye each morning and tells me he loves me and hopes I have a wonderful day. All while dodging hamsters, the swinging arms of the stationary beast, my sweaty face and my scowling. The fact that he kisses me goodbye, without fail, despite the perils, tells me he loves me more than his words. Oh, and he smells so freakin good in the morning I just wanna burry my face in his neck. It's just what the Dr. ordered to shift my mood to the left. Better than any little pill I assure you.

today being my Thursday. 4 day weekend here I come! I'm going to spend Friday on the computer plotting out our return to paradise. Apparently this year we are renting a Winnebago and driving to Key West. This ought to be very interesting. Good thing the 4 of us like each other as much as we do.

DWTS. Donny just killed his freestyle! *booty dances* Donny is just dreamy. All you punk kids and scoffers can just kiss my fluffy boohiney.

Me and the Man in Paradise 2009

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