Saturday, October 9, 2010
Day 282 - Life in a Vacuum
There is a theme running through my house lately. "You're not living life in a Vacuum." Today I had to explain to the Pixie what that meant.
"Life in a vacuum is disconnected from the world around it. It is singular and isolated. It is autonomous. What goes on within the "Bubble" if you will, has no effect on the world around it. Nothing outside the vacuum effects life within. Think about Grandpa and how he uses his vacuum sealer to preserve his sauces and niblets. It keeps air out, bacteria out, and keeps whats in fresh as the day it was packaged."
Come on now, it's the best I can do for a 13 year old.
"You my dear do not live in a vacuum. Every single action you take, from a breath to a choice, to an action effects those around you. When you breath in you are consuming the air around you. When you breath out you are expelling carbon dioxide. When you take a step you change the earth. If there happens to be an ant under your foot, it dies and you've changed the ant colony. If you happen to step on a flower, you change the feeding habits of those insects dependent on it for food. When you act, you effect those around you. YOUR choices effect not only you, but those around you, those that love you."
I went on to give an example but that's family history and not something I wish to share with the www. I know right? Something I keep private? Contrary to evidence to the contrary, I do keep SOME things private.
Anyway, this all came about because of changes in our family dynamic. The prodigal daughters return in fact. Her return has changed our family. It has changed the Pixies place in that family and I'm making a big deal out of it. Also, Puberty has moved in. It has swallowed whole my youngest child and returned to me a child who thinks she is autonomous. That because she is 13 she has the ability to speak her mind, talk back, use "THAT" tone, ignore curfews, hygiene requirements, and chores.
So, today we had a nice long conversation in the parking lot of the local Wal-Mart. We discussed life in a vacuum and we discussed how my reaction to her actions would rock her world.
Today I'm grateful for:
not living life in a vacuum. I have always been acutely aware of how I effect the world around me. Even during my "checked out" years. I knew, I simply didn't care. At the end of my life, when I'm face to face with the Creator, and I'm asked to explain myself I will have a long list of sins. However, on my short list of attributes, I will say "I didn't live life in a vacuum"
rare teaching moments. Today I talked with my youngest child. I'm not sure why, but with all 3 of my daughters, a great number of our best conversations happened in the car. Today's was no exception. We continued our conversation as we made our way through the isles of the local Wal-Mart completely oblivious the the horde of shoppers around us. She asked questions and I gave her complete and honest answers. I'm sure many out there will argue with my definition of "Life in a Vacuum" but you know what? This is mine and I shared it with her. Now it's up to her to decide her own definition. However, if she don't quit giving me tude, I'm going to use her grandpa's vacuum sealer and SHOW her what life in a vacuum feels like.
"Have you ever noticed that even though you call me 'Lord' and 'King', I have never really acted in that capacity with you? I've never taken control of your choices or forced you to do anything, even when what you were about to do was destructive and hurtful to yourself and others."
"To force my will on you is exactly what love does not do. Genuine relationships are marked by submission even when your choices are not helpful or healthy"
A quote from "The Shack". I have been struggling to read this book for more than a year now. I keep giving it away and it keeps coming back to me. At some point, someone I gave the book to marked this passage in yellow. I see why. It's a note directly to me and directly to my conversation with the Pixie. She is growing and changing and "I" need to remember that love is submission. I've been working on "submitting with grace" to the man. It's been difficult and the idea of "ME" submitting to one of my kids REALLY goes against the grain of my pride. Submission = love. If God can do it for his kids, I suppose I can try and do it for mine. Pray for me dear stalkers because this is going to be a bumpy lesson indeed.