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Thursday, October 7, 2010

Day 280 - Crown of Thorns


Not that long ago it used to be a priority of mine to keep God out of my blog. At first it was because he and I were on the outs and I simply didn't want to give him free publicity. Then, I was so angry at having fallen into his "trap" that I continued to boycott him. Then I went through the phase where I said "OK, I can mention him, but just a little and only using vague metaphors" Then there was the defensive posts where I would reiterate that just because I was now one of "them" I wasn't really one of THEM and I was going to stop putting so much God into my posts. Then I put God into my posts anyway and inevitably what would follow was a tirade about how I have not really changed and that I'm still a Liberal and I'm still pro-choice and Pro-Gay Marriage. Like somehow when you become a Christian some mystical thing happens and all your beliefs, standards and morals are swallowed up by the Holy Spirit and you become nothing more than a drone of Christ? Um, yeah, I was so freakin wrong it's laughable.

When I go back and see the path I've taken I'm appalled at some of the stuff I've written. I sounded like what I was, insecure and Defensive. I'm still insecure but I've now dropped my defenses and my pretenses. I'm freely stating that I am a fool for God. I am a Christian woman. I feel no need to proclaim my political alliance, my stance on any issue or apologize for the fact that God is now in nearly every post. I am what I am and what I am is property of him. And guess what else?

I'm OK with that.

Peace ~

Today I'm grateful for:

the Crown of Thorns. It's a beautiful plant and it spurred an awesome conversation between my Auntie and I. She spoke so sweetly of how her own prodigal daughter had such a way with plants and how, if she only had the money, she would build her a greenhouse. She spoke lovingly of how her youngest could make anything grow and how proud she was that she turned her life around. Even the Crown of Thorns. A plant native to warm, dry climates, now grows so beautifuly in RI, a world away from it's origins and so far removed from it's "Optimal growing conditions" it still blooms. Then she spoke about the crown of thorns worn by Christ. She pointed out how this plant, so beautiful on the surface, had such massive thorns. As she spoke her voice got soft and her eyes got shiny. It's a conversation that lasted 10 minutes at most, but one that I will store in my treasure box of memories forever.

being loved more than his mustang. Dude, that's epic.

nice owners. They are as rare as honest lawyers so when I find one, I remember to be grateful.

my job. I love my job in ways I had not anticipated loving any job outside of "Internationally acclaimed Rock Superstar"

God. Every day, in every way, I unabashedly worship him and I'm grateful for the opportunity to do it for eternity.

For Judy's latest update. God is good indeed.

Hi everybody!  I apologize for not sending an update in a while, but there really hasn’t been any news.  Today, however, I received some very good news – my CEA number, which went up to almost 11 back in May, is now down to 6.4!  This is great progress and tells us that the chemo is again doing its job.  We will hold off doing any scan since we are sure from the blood work that things are just where they should be right now.  As long as I continue on the chemo, that number should continue to drop.  I’ve been feeling well and the side effects are still quite tolerable, so we will not have to make any adjustments.  Thanks so much for your continued prayers!  Since school started, I’ve had two students out with strep throat and several others with various ailments.  God has protected me from these things so far, and I’m looking forward to the end of our first quarter in just a couple of weeks.  My parents will be visiting with us during the last week of October.  We are looking forward to cooler temperatures and maybe some beautiful fall foliage in the mountains while they’re here.  Psalm 63:7-8: Because you have been my help, therefore in the shadow of your wings I will rejoice.  My soul follows close behind you; your right hand upholds me.

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