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Saturday, May 15, 2010

Day 135 - Lost

“I'm lost in the middle of my birthday. I want my friends, their touch, with the earth's last love. I will take life's final offering, I will take the last human blessing.” ~Rabindranath Tagore~


Today I'm grateful for:

feeling lost. It means eventually I'll be found. I'll sit right here till I find myself. Eventually a random mood wave will bring me by this way again. When I find myself again perhaps I'll have a rad story to tell.

coffee. I've had 4 cups this morning. That may explain the electrical buzzing noise in my head.

my wide open day. The man is out playing golf. He will be gone all day. Whatever will I do with myself?

a small grocery list. Today is the 15th. I get paid once a month on the 20th. I'm pretty sure I don't have to explain further.

VH1's top 20. I think the last time I watched this show is back when VH1 played ONLY music videos 24/7 but I was surprised how many songs I really liked. Shocking...

external laptop meeses. It's kept me from gently placing my new laptop on the floor and repeatedly pouncing on it.

books. Today I'm getting a new one. I'm a happy camper. (I actually got two)

the sound of a quiet house. All I hear is the fish tank gurgling and the hamster’s sleepy breathing. I feel lost but in the quiet I hear God's whisper "I'm here" I've lost me but he knows right where to look. I'm at peace

growth. I'm going through a season and I'm not fighting it. Like working out, I've discovered I like the process. Even if it's uncomfortable.

anticipation. I wonder what I'll learn. I'm excited to see.

adventure in the mundane. It's a lazy quiet Saturday and I'm excited to live it.

the Pixie. She keeps me from crawling back into myself. She keeps me connected to her and the world. It's not her job but she does it with ease and grace. I want to be like her when I grow up.

lunch at Panara's with a garden pixie and a laptop named Biscotti. Hey Sarah, I get it now. This is awesomeness in food for the soul form.

not being in time out. I lead the 4th grade freaks in the pursuit of patience. Um, this ought to be interesting seeing I have none. BUT the lesson plan mentioned graffiti so I'm going with that theme *eyes Ms. Amy* What?

999 texts. Seriously June? I set your limit to 999 just to be on the safe side but never dreaming you'd actually NEED that limit. Then I hear "Hey mom what's "You have reached your pre-paid limit." mean?" Oh. My. Dog. 999 texts in 29 days? "It means you are very lucky tomorrow is the 15th. Our account recycles on the 15th. Tomorrow you can do it all again." *sighs* I am exceedingly grateful I set her limit cuz if she goes over and I get charged $.10 a text my head will explode.

working on my list while sipping tangerine tea at Panara’s. Sitting here watching the Pixie try to blow out the fake flame on the birthday cake on her Target gift card I feel less lost. She is my peeps and she is dorkalisous.

$.99 bookstore buttons.

the sentence "I Wanna Bee a Shutter Bug."

the *click I stole your soul* w/ a photo of a camera button purchased for me by the Pixie. It may be in poor taste for church tomorrow but oh well. I rocks.

butterfly garden growth. Last year our butterfly garden died quickly. This year it is growing beautifully. Unfortunately, still no butterflies but we built it, they will come.

I've been typing my list all day. My day is now closing and it turned out to be a grand day of crazy sock shopping, digging for treasure in a the tin button bin, lunch with a happy Pixie, made some kick butt potato salad and I still look forward to movie night with my favorite human. Life is good and there is sweetness in being lost.

The day it was planted


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