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Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Day 90 - Moondancing in the Moonshadows with a side order of Remorse

“Classic remorse, as all the moralists are agreed, is a most undesirable sentiment. If you have behaved badly, repent, make what amends you can and address yourself to the task of behaving better next time. On no account brood over your wrongdoing. ROLLING IN THE MUCK IS NOT THE BEST WAY OF GETTING CLEAN.”
~Aldous Huxley~

Today I'm grateful for:

remorse. Feeling this crappy about something I've done is the truest assurance I won’t do it again. I've done it before, I've felt remorse before, I can only pray my repentance, ask for forgiveness and work diligently to assure I do not do it again. Lucky for me the hamster forgives easy. Though I do wish he would stop pooping on the treadmill.

the fact that I didn't hurt the hamster. My Poor Boy Roy picked the wrong day to poop on the treadmill again. For an instant his Momma was swallowed up by a screaming, flailing, hamster stalking demon. When I hugged him goodbye he licked my nose. That doubled my guilt.

the confidence that I can figure out why the hamster is pooping on Wilson. It seems Roy still loves the treadmill but for 3 days in a row, I've walked the hamster by moonlight and felt SURE he made a pile outside. BUT he's pooping on the treadmill. A full size poop too *sighs* Day one I just ignored it and assumed I didn't give him time to finish, day 2 I assumed the hamster eating demon disguised as a Yorkie next door scared him so he didn't finish, but I stopped feeding him before his walkies just in case. Today there were NO distractions and I MADE SURE he piled, waited to feed him till after, moved the treadmill JIC so the wall is spared when it flings, and STILL a full load of poop. *sighs more* WTH? We WILL figure this out so the hamster can continue his friendship with Wilson and I discontinue trying to turn the hamster into an h'orderve.

not falling into the depression pit. This morning, after 3 weeks of avoiding the scale, working out twice a day nearly every day, watching every bit I put into my mouth and loads of prayer I get on the scale. 193.0 *growls* I assume this is why the hamsters poop flinging set me off. Bad timing there Roy.

anticipation for 4th grade goodness. I get to lead the 4th grade Upstreet class on Easter Sunday. How lucky am I? I can't wait!

Easter Bunny goodness. He is hopping the Pixies way with a few surprises in his basket. I can't wait for the squeels.

moonshadows. We had a near full moon this morning. The hamster and I had fun moondancing prior to the poo flinging mind you. We danced and played and made fabulous moonshadows. I need to find a way to get moonshadows on film. Moonshadows are total radical coolness yo *makes odd faux street hand gesture*

This morning, in the predawn light of a near full moon, my backyard was transformed into a forest where wild things are. Odd moonshadows danced as the hamster pranced while making puddles and piles. As the tall palm tree near the back fence swayed, the rustling sounded like beasties running across a forest floor, the moving moonshadows looked like clawed paws reaching out to lift the unsuspecting human into the air. The hamster steadfast in his examination of every blade of grass noticed too. He sat and watched with head cocked to one side, ears alert and rotating like radar dishes at the sounds. In that moment, basked in the glow of the moon, I was content. Playing out my own version of "Where the Wild things Are" starring Roy the Alien Hamster and my favorite Wild Thing JW.

Less than an hour later I would be chasing the hamster with a towel full of poo, intent on bodily harm, but in this moment we sat and watched and enjoyed each other’s company by the light of the nearly full moon. I love you Roy, even if I don't always act like it.

I could not pick ONE, so I'm posting both.
So there... 

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