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Monday, December 7, 2009

Monday Gratitude

I've decided that the new hamster cage is an alien hamster transporting device. I stuffed my hamster in it Friday night and it spit out some alien hamster Saturday morning. The hamster it spit out hardly whined all night, let me sleep in, made puddles and piles outside on command, and plays in the cage voluntarily as long as the door remains open.

The aliens sent the "real" Roy back Sunday evening though. All seemed hunkey doory as I walked the hamster on his leash in the back yard cooing the usual "good boy, come on, let’s make a puddle out here and not on Mommy's nice clean carpet" when I heard what I thought was the neighbors Shih-tzu bark. Well silly me. Apparently it was not a Shih-tzu but an evil hamster eating demon because Roy bolted for the door. Due to the fact that he was on his leash, he got only so far then snapped back like a retractable tape measure. Up he popped and hearing the evil hamster eating demon bark again, again bolted for the door before I could scoop him up and again, snapped back landing on his back. Apparently, unlike cats, hamsters do not always land on their feet. Again the evil thing barked and this time Roy got smarter. He backed out of his collar THEN ran for the door. This time, he reached the door but forgot it was closed. With a dull "Thud-splat" nose made contact with glass. Roy let out with the most pathetic set of squeaks and squeals I have ever heard.

At this point the evil hamster eating demon disguised as a Shih-Tuz was called in for his "din din" and Roy was left a puddle of shivering hamster flesh. Here I scooped him up, did my best to sooth his frayed nerves, put him back in his collar and tried to resume getting him to make a puddle outside. *sighs* FAIL! From this point forward, I did not walk the hamster but drag him, he refused to make puddles and at every given opportunity he backed out of his collar, ran for the door and sat there waiting for me to let him in. I can only assume evil hamster eating demons are attracted by hamster piss. *sighs* After 10 minutes of me screaming and dragging him I gave up. Enough trauma for one day.

Funny thing though, I stuffed the hamster in the alien transporter device and when I woke this morning the alien hamster was back. He went outside and made a puddle and a pile first thing without ever being asked. Then, watched me as I rode the stationary beast from the comfort of his cage, skipped his breakfast, came when I called him, sat on the edge of the tub and watched me shower WITHOUT falling in this time and allowed me to scoop him up and deposit him back in the transporter device when it was time to leave for work. This is starting to be like that old girls game "Mystery Date" Open the door and you have no idea what's going to come out. When the hamster is released tonight, will we have the brave, well behaved alien hamster, or the freak who is scared of demons, makes puddles in the house and likes to eat my underwear?

Today I'm grateful for:

alien hamsters.

the Reed Family Cookie Boxes. I have had 3 people ask me about this years. Guess that means they're a hit :)

Christmas Capes. I found the Pretty little Christmas cape Lisa wore when she was 2. It's been through all 3 of my girls and is now on its way to Ari. *pokes Lisa* I want photos of her in it!

my Mom. Her heart is broken, her nerves are frayed yet she is trying and that right there is awesome.

Alien hamster transportation devices. Seriously, they are freakin awesome! For most of the last 3 days all puddles and piles have been outside. Extraordinary.

Mondays. I'm a freak. I like them.

a full Calendar. I am jam packed with lots of interesting adventures between now and Christmas. I also have to squeeze in the rest of my shopping, baking, helping the BFF move, wrapping and whatnots. If I can pull it all off you'd better check me for Alien DNA. I may have been dragged into the cage.

God. He gave me this brain. Sometimes it's scary in here but it's never boring.

life. It freakin rocks. I'm glad I'm smart enough to get it.

Just because it's grey and yucky today.
This is all pretty and blue and fluffy awesomeness.

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